I hear the rumours, I hear the gossip, the things people say, I see the looks, I'm sure if looks could kill I would be dead hundred times over again. Which Is something I expected from people when Adrian and I separated. But honestly it still hurts. Shocking I know!
There's so many things I wanna say, but I don't know how. Let's start off by saying Adrian and I are getting a divorce. We are co parenting together and so far it's been good. We have had a couple of rough patches but after a few talks it's been way better and we are learning to get along, be friends and co parent together. Our boys are number one, and we put their well being, feelings, and needs before us.
We have both moved on. He has a wonderful girlfriend and I have a wonderful boyfriend. We are both happy. We both have moved on. That being said I'm not saying it's easy peasy we both are still figuring things out but it's getting easier.
I don't expect people to understand why we are getting a divorce or to agree with it. But what I do expect from people is to realize that Adrian and I are human, we both have made mistakes, we both have regrets, but the important thing is that we both forgive each other and we are moving on and sometimes I wish people would also move on from this. I know people are going to pick sides which sucks, I know people are going to have their opinions and stories, and I know people are not going to care to know both sides of the story. Honestly though I think it's between Adrian, God and I.
Life goes on, the world keeps spinning. With that being said I'm not saying that every day is okie dokie, there are days where gut wrenching sobs escape and I feel like I've been hit by a truck. Those are the days I look up and say thank you. I thank God that even though I failed him and other people, that he still loves me and sees me as his child, that even when I feel so very lonely that he is sitting right next to me listening to me, I thank him everyday for the people that he put in my life that showed me what Jesus is all about.
We can go through this life listening to all the rumours, comparing ourselves, angry, bitter and hurt, but I'm not going to anymore. I'm done. I don't wanna be bitter towards people. I'm going to move on. Forgive myself, forgive others and move on.
